Middle Aged, Baby-Steps

I did it. Today, I made my first, middle aged, baby-steps toward something I started when I was still a teenager…college. I was nervous, and excited, as I drove toward campus. Just to even say the words – driving to college. Crazy. It’s been so long since I’ve seen the inside of a classroom that didn’t belong to one of our (many) children – nearly two decades, actually.

Where did the time go?

It went into our lives, and the lives of so many others. It went into stress that always led to joy, and headaches that always gave way to comfort. It ticked away in tears, in smiles, and sometimes in laughing til we cried. It was spent on growth – physical, emotional, mental, spiritual maturation. It cruised along the lines of the “we shoulds” and the “what-ifs” and the “somedays” that we always talked about…and now are here. Today.

So today I did it. My very first, middle aged, baby-steps…walking nervously through an unfamiliar building on an unfamiliar campus toward an old, familiar goal – ME. Admissions, Financial Aid, Assessment testing, Advising, nerves, sweaty palms, rapid heartrate, prayer, and then a spirit of calm. An inner peace that, although it may be challenging at times, I can do this – one day at a time, one week at a time, one quarter at a time – I can do this.

I will do this.